What Would Water Do?

Have you ever watched moving water? Not just sat on the beach looking for dolphins, or cast a fishing line into a babbling brook, but really watched moving water?

If you study it even for a minute, you'll see immediately what happens when water encounters obstacles. When a large rock blocks its way, it takes one of several actions:

• It goes around it
• It goes over it
• In some cases it goes under it
• It may swirl around near it for a while before inevitably taking one of the prior three options
• Occasionally it brings the rock with it on its journey
  
• ... and finally, eventually it polishes it smooth and may even wear it down into sand.

Notice that nowhere in this scenario did the water take the rock personally, and seldom does water EVER flow backwards!

Rocks are there for a reason. Perhaps it's to challenge you to be more creative in your journey down the river. Perhaps they serve to filter out those who aren't strong enough to continue down their chosen path. Perhaps that's just where the rocks live, and it has NOTHING to do with you. Most things in life really aren't about you - as my dearest one reminds me of frequently!

When you encounter rocks and other roadblocks in your journey down life's riverbed, how do you react? Do you spend all your time swirling in front of the rock, grumbling about how it's there to get in your way? Do you blame the rock for its mere existence? Do you put all of your energy into trying to move the rock, or into trying to make the rock change into something else it isn't? Perhaps there's another way.

Be like water. Look for the path of least resistance - it's the most natural thing on earth to do. First of all, don't automatically jump to the solution of moving or changing the rock. That may not be the best option and you may never succeed. Ask yourself if you can simply go around/over/under it, and if not, why not? Too many of us fear this most obvious of solutions because it seems like we're letting the rock "win" ... and we jump to the assumption that if the rock "wins" then we lose by default. Challenge yourself on this concept - more often than not, the winning and losing is all in your head, and the rock couldn't care less. Most rocks in your life aren't there to spite you - they're just there. As Grama says, "That's Life!"

Action Challenge: If you're constantly fighting rocks, look for alternate paths that don't require you to take on that fight, if your bigger mission simply is to get further down the stream. [Having said that, if your passion is in rock fighting, then fight away! Just don't blame the rocks for being what (or who) they are :o)]

Start with something small that's causing you unhappiness. Do you constantly struggle over who gets to control the remote for the TV? Ask yourself if this is a fight that is really worth upsetting your inner harmony. Consider alternatives - perhaps you and the rock you're battling can take turns controlling the remote on different days. Maybe you can watch on a different TV, so you each get your own remote. You can buy and program a second universal remote for the same TV and you can both control it. Finally at the end of the day, you can simply ask for the channel or volume to be changed and rely on the other person do it. Regardless of what the fight is over, the fundamental question you need to decide first is "what's it worth to me?" then take it into your own hands to find the path of least resistance. Be careful not to fight just because you can, and remember - it takes two people to fight. The best way to end most struggles simply is to stop struggling. I've learned that it's hard to argue with someone who agrees with you.

Ultimately you'll want to assess the 3-5 biggest things in your life that are interfering with you getting where you want to go, and (a) stop taking it personally, and (b) do something about it. Don't wait for someone else to change the situation. If you want to start a new career as a caterer, but can't get your toe in the door because you don't have the right degree or related experience... stop and think about that. Consider applying for culinary school, and/or applying for a job at someone else's restaurant (lowly as the job may be), and/or offering free catering for friends and family (do ask them to cover the food materials!) to start building up references and clientèle.

The path of least resistance isn't always easy, but it does allow you to proceed past the rocks you encounter along life's way, which is easier on the soul than getting stuck on a rock forever.

Cheers and all my best to you!
~Brooxi

"Following the path of least resistance is the essence of Zen gentleness. This concept hints at the delicate nature of learning to go with the flow."

- Anonymous

© Stephanie Brooks 2008

Leave Your Bag Outside!

A story I came across today from Jason Elliott - with a great message!  Thought I'd share.

I read a story many years back.  The author was saying every night when his neighbor came home, the neighbor would stop at the tree outside his house, and act like he was hanging an invisible bag on one of the branches of the tree.  Every morning on his way to work, the neighbor would stop by the same branch and pick up the imaginary bag.  After weeks of watching this, the author got up the nerve to ask the neighbor what he was doing.  The neighbor commented this was his way of leaving the worries, and hassles of work outside, so his family time was not bothered by such things.  I have tried to leave my bag outside ever since.

Cheers and all my best to you!
~Brooxi


© Stephanie Lennon 2010

A Different Take on Rocks

I am a Project Manager

I didn’t go to school for it – far from it. However, in my career I’ve been fortunate to get into project management roles and learn how to be a fantastic project manager. It makes me giggle when I come across folks who say they don’t like project management because in my opinion, *everyone* is a project manager. Frankly, if you regularly get up, and get yourself bathed, dressed, fed, and to work on time – you’re a project manager.

What does Project Management mean? It means making sure you have the right plan, the right people, and the right prioritization in place to ensure everything happens as desired. We all have more balls to juggle at any given time than most of us really like. How can you make sure that you can accomplish all your deliverables? How can you get good results in a timely fashion? How can you make sure you're focusing on the right things?

Have you ever heard the story about the university professor who did the demonstration on priorities?

He took a big jar, and started to fill the jar with big rocks first... When he finished, he asked the audience if the jar was full yet. When everyone said yes, he pushed some pebbles in the jar, and asked the audience again if the jar was full already. After having everyone's clear & loud agreement, he poured some sand to the jar, filling up the spaces between the big rocks and the pebbles. When he asked again whether the jar was full yet, there were already some doubt in the air... Finally he took a bottle of water and poured it into the jar, over the big rocks, pebbles and sand. The idea of the story was that if he started in reverse order, and put in the water first, then the sand followed by the pebbles, he never could have managed to fit the big rocks into the jar.

Using the analogy of the story above, the jar is your life, and the big rocks are your major goals and objectives. If you focus on a lot of easy-to-do, quick tasks all day (e.g., e-mail, IM, TV, video games, etc.), months and years will fly by and you’ll never get around to doing the things you most want to do. If you have your key priorities in the front of your mind and work on them first, things will automatically fall into place.

Action Challenge: This week try to focus on improving your ability to prioritize. Make a daily list of your "To Do" items. Rank them by asking yourself :

1. What are my *Big Rocks*? What are my three key action items & deliverables today to accomplish my daily, weekly & monthly goals?
2. What are my top three priorities in relation to my overall life goals?
3. What happens if I don't do this task? What happens if I do it? What is the impact on my immediate objectives & on my lifetime goals?

When you have come up with the ranking, spend your time and effort on the top 3 items. Don’t let yourself get distracted with the sand and water in your life – it will still be there later.

Cheers and all my best to you!
~Brooxi

" For NASA, space is still a high priority."

-Dan Quayle

© Stephanie Lennon 2010